No Surprize
(Original Album: Night in the Ruts, 1979)

nineteen seventy one
we all heard the starters gun
New York is such a pity but at Max's Kansas City we won
we all shot the shit at the bar
with Johnny O'Toole and his scar
and then old Clive Davis said he's surely gonna make us a star
I'm gonna make you a star
just the way you are

but with all his style
I could see in his eyes
that we is goin' on trial
and it was no surprize

the boys kept kickin' ass
as usual time will tell
but some bitch in the choir threw waters on the fires of hell
she loved to show and tell
lord she loved to tell

Chorus 2:
but with all our style
you could see in our eyes
that we is still on trial

baby it's no surprize, no surprize, no surprize, no surprize

midnight ladysituation fetal
vaccinate your ass with your phonograph needle
I say lookie here friend of mine
scratch like you need calomine
flamingo boots soles a-creakin'
still in love and Puerto Rican too

ridin' on the wheels of hell
smokin' up our axle grease
oh the backstage is rockin' and we're coppin' from the local police
that's right the local police
or the justice of peace


rock and roll junkie whore
got my foot inside the door
knock knock, knock knock, knock
nobody's keepin' score

bad times go away
come again some other day
topaz and sassafraz will keep the blues away

candy store rock and roll
corporation jelly roll
play the singles it ain't me
it's programmed insanity
you ASCAP if BMI
could ever make a mountian fly
if Japanese can boil teas
then where the fuck's my royalties?